1928 - Alderson High School - 1968


A. A. Asbury January 30, 2010


The following events took place in Alderson, Snake Run and Saw Mill Hollow several years ago. I, A. A. Asbury, have checked out the facts and I can certify, on my best Scout’s Honor, that the events are true and that the facts of the story have not been changed or embellished. However, the names of the participants have been changed to protect both the innocent and the guilty.


For several years rumors have been abundant around Alderson, and in fact around West Virginia, about sightings of Big Foot in Snake Run and, in particular, in the adjacent Saw Mill Hollow. The rumors tell of locals in Snake Run catching a glimpse of a big long-haired and possibly menacing creature tromping through the woods. There are stories of chickens and other small farm animals that have gone missing and it has been assumed that these missing animals were taken by Big Foot. Locals have set traps for the creature with no success.

Locals also say that there are two-headed snakes in Snake Run. In fact, some around Alderson say that two-headed people have also been known to reside there from time to time. It has also been rumored that some of the folks in Saw Mill Hollow have been known to practice the Bat Method of Child Birth. That’s when the expectant mother hangs from the ceiling of a cave by her feet and hopes that the little beggar can learn to fly before it hits the ground.

Hearing these rumors for several years, Boozer decided to mount an expedition to Snake Run to find out more about these so-called Big Foot sightings and about the two-headed snakes. Boozer had seen two-headed snakes on TV before, but he had always thought that they were faked. However, he surmised that if the rumors about Big Foot were true and if he could somehow capture Big Foot, then he would become famous throughout the world and this would mean riches for him beyond his wildest dreams. He dreamed of displaying Big Foot in a big steel cage and traveling around the world with his display. He also envisioned “layouts” in magazines such as Science and National Geographic about Big Foot and the technique he had used to capture “The Creature.” He convinced himself that he would be invited to appear on Oprah and other high-profile TV programs. So in the summer of 25 AED (AED = After Elvis’ Death) Boozer employed a guide for his expedition. The guide was none other than the well-known and extremely well-liked Three Eight Ball. Three Eight Ball grew up in Saw Mill Hollow and his knowledge of the area and its people is unsurpassed. It is told that this man pocketed the eight ball three times in a row on the break while playing the game of eight ball pool. From that time forward he has been known as Three Eight Ball by all.


Some of the events that took place during the expedition involve Elvis Presley, so a little history is in order. Elvis was born in Tupelo, Mississippi on January 8, 1935 and he went on to become a “rock star”, adored by large groups of young people around the world. To this day these fans continue to use the abbreviation AED for After Elvis’ Death to give a date when writing letters to each other and when announcing dates for fan club meetings. Elvis is thought to have died of a drug overdose in 1977 at Graceland in Memphis, Tennessee. However, there has always been a question as to whether or not Elvis actually died. Many of his fans believe that his death was faked and they have never given up hope that Elvis will someday be found alive. It is known that Elvis was under tremendous pressure to perform and that he was reluctant to do so due to the fact that he had gained a great deal of weight. Many of his fans believe that he is still alive and hiding out so that he can live his life in peace, free of the pressures placed on him by his adoring fans. Over the years there have been numerous sightings of Elvis reported in the press; Elvis in Europe, Elvis in Canada, Elvis in Latin America, etc. So is Elvis still alive? The question persists to this day.


One fall day, Boozer collected Three Eight Ball and they drove in the direction of Blue Sulfur. It was raining lightly, so it was not the best of days to undertake such an expedition. However, Boozer was anxious to get on with the search, so he and Three Eight Ball decided to ignore the rain. Boozer had never been to Snake Run before, and about 100 yards, before reaching the old Blue Sulfur spring, Three Eight Ball hollered “cut left, cut left.” Boozer whipped the truck left and they were on the Snake Run Road. They drove for several minutes and then Three Eight Ball pointed out that if they were to take an old and extremely rutted dirt road going off to the left, then they would end up in Saw Mill Hollow. Shortly after that Three Eight Ball announced that they were in Snake Run. Boozer couldn’t see much other than woods, fields and a few apparently abandoned houses. Driving on they came upon a Sweet Little Old Lady walking along the road holding a small umbrella and dressed in a long flowered dress with black Converse tennis shoes adorning her feet. Boozer pulled the truck to the side of the road, rolled down the window and began to speak to the woman. She spoke with a pronounced southern accent.

BOOZER: Good afternoon, madam. We have heard that there are two-headed snakes in the area. Could you tell us where we might see one?

SWEET LITTLE OLD LADY: Oh yes, there’s two-headed snakes here, but you won’t see’m today cause it’s arainin. They are in them there holes right now, so come back another day and you might see’m. The best place to see two-headed snakes is in Saw Mill Holler which is someways back down the road.

BOOZER: Have you heard anything about Big Foot being in the area?

SWEET LITTLE OLD LADY: Big Foot? Don’t know what ye means!

BOOZER: We have heard rumors that there is a big hairy creature living in the woods around here. Know anything about that?

SWEET LITTLE OLD LADY: Never heared about it round here, but could be in Saw Mill Holler. Think I’ve heared some folks speak of that.

BOOZER: Thanks madam. Oh, by the way I can tell from your accent that you are not from West Virginia. Where are you from?

SWEET LITTLE OLD LADY: I am from Alabama.

With that the Sweet Little Old Lady, with a twinkle in her eye, began to dance a jig while at the same time singing Ramma, Jamma, Ramma Jamma, give’m hell Alabama.

SWEET LITTLE OLD LADY: I truly hated to leave that Alabama football team, but I came up here to be close to Elvis.

BOOZER: Thanks for the information.

Boozer didn’t follow up on the Elvis remark thinking that the Sweet Little Old Lady might be one vegetable short of a plate lunch. So he rolled up the window on the truck and he and Three Eight Ball continued on their way, out Snake Run Road to Grassy Meadows and then to I-64 and back to Alderson. On the way back, Boozer and Three Eight Ball discussed the Sweet Little Old Ladies’ observation that a big hairy creature might be found in Saw Mill Hollow. By this time the two-headed snakes had slipped from their minds as they both became excited about maybe catching a glimpse of what might turn out to be Big Foot.


Boozer and Three Eight Ball decided to mount a second expedition to the Snake Run area, but this time they decided to camp out in Saw Mill Hollow. They collected food stuffs, what they considered to be enough for a full week of camping out.

As the boys entered Saw Mill Hollow, the surroundings reminded them of the story of Ichabod Crane and the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow, a story they had both read in school. The Headless Horseman was supposedly the ghost of a soldier who had his head shot off by a stray cannonball during a battle in the American Revolutionary War and who rode forth to the scene of battle in nightly quest of his head. Because of this story Boozer and Three Eight Ball both were somewhat frightened when they thought of spending nights in Saw Mill Hollow. They were frightened of not knowing what strange events might await them.

On the first day in Saw Mill Hollow as Boozer and Three Eight Ball were checking out the area, they came upon what appeared to be a middle-aged lady hanging upside down from a tree limb by her feet. Upon closer inspection they discovered others, who must have been her children, hanging on various other limbs of the tree in exactly the same manner. The boys cautiously circled the tree several times, taking in the unusual display before them. And then Three Eight Ball spoke.

THREE EIGHT BALL: Say, Lady, what are you doing?

UPSIDE DOWN LADY: Oh, just arestin and awaitin fer night to come, so that me and me children can roam the forest to see what food we can find.

THREE EIGHT BALL: But how do you see on a dark night?

UPSIDE DOWN LADY: We don’t have to see. We have learned how to make small clicking sounds that bounce off the trees. These sounds return to our brains and enable us to navigate through the forest.
BOOZER: Have you seen a big hairy creature roaming the woods around here?

UPSIDE DOWN LADY: Could be, I think I heared it’s footsteps, but I never seed it.
That was encouragement for the boys and they thought that they would at least see the creature by the weekend. But they had seen a family hanging upside down by their feet from the limbs of a tree. Holy Smokes!, what other strange things might they encounter? The next few days and nights passed uneventfully, but occasionally late at night they could hear footsteps at what appeared to be some distance from them. At that point, the boys guessed that it must be the Upside Down Lady and her children hunting food. On the night before they were to break camp and return to Alderson, they began to hear footsteps that were getting closer and closer to their camp. Thump, Thump, THUMP, THUMP, BOOM!, BOOM!!, BOOM!!! This time both Three Eight Ball and Boozer thought that it must be the Creature because the footsteps were so loud. They couldn’t tell exactly how close the footsteps were to them, but as the footsteps grew closer, the ground began to shake with each footstep. In fact, the shaking of the ground and booming footsteps scared both of them so badly that they hid, as best they could, behind a big tree. The footsteps quickly passed, BOOM!!!, BOOM!!, BOOM!, THUMP, THUMP, Thump. The next morning the boys overcame their fear and searched the area for signs of the Creature’s passing, but nothing was found that would help identify it. They noticed that several small one- to two-inch “saplin” trees in the area were crushed to the ground, so it must have been something really big and heavy. Maybe it was someone’s bull that had gotten loose or maybe a massively large wild hog. However, they both entertained the possibility that it might be Big Foot.

The boys had planned to return to Alderson the next morning but because of this event they decided to stay one more night, hoping that they might catch a glimpse of Big Foot. That night they discovered that they were almost out of food, only peanut butter, bread and bananas were left. Later that night Three Eight Ball had a brilliant idea. Why not leave some food on a big log that was only about 15 yards from their camp. Maybe the food would attract the Creature and they could then catch a glimpse of it. So the boys prepared four peanut butter and banana sandwiches and put them on the log. Later that evening the booming footsteps started again and this time Boozer and Three Eight Ball were hiding in a thicket close to the log. After waiting for a period of time a very, very large gentleman broke into the clearing beside the log. He was truly large, a giant who was much, much larger than any man that either Boozer or Three Eight Ball had ever seen. He had long waist-length matted gray hair that covered his entire head, including his face. He swept the hair from the front of his mouth, ate the sandwiches quickly and turned to walk away. Both Boozer and Three Eight Ball sprang from the thicket and Three Eight Ball hollered to the man, “Say, Buddy, how’d you like the sandwiches?” The man turned slowly, pulled the hair from his face, spread his legs, swiveled his torso and large stomach and said in a low melodious voice “Thank you very much, just like the ones my dear mother in Mississippi used to make.” And then, he said it again with a slight southern draw, “Thank you very much” and this time, as he spoke, he held one hand waist high and pointed towards the boys with his forefinger.

Boozer and Three Eight Ball looked at each other and at the same time they both said,
“Good Heavens, Hattie, it’s Elvis. Elvis Lives, ELVIS LIVES!”

They both slowly recovered from their shock and then turned to speak to Elvis, but by this time he was gone, somehow silently.

About that time the Sweet Little Old Lady broke into the clearing and jumped the log with great athletic form, the form of a high hurdler track star with her front leg outstretched and with her body leaning over her leading leg. Just as quickly, she disappeared into the woods, chasing wildly after the large gentleman who the boys thought was Elvis.
The next morning, as they were leaving Saw Mill Hollow, they came upon the Sweet Old Lady again on Snake Run Road. She had a bed roll tied neatly to her back and she seemed to be heading for Blue Sulfur. Boozer pulled the truck to the side of the road and began to speak to her.

BOOZER: We saw Elvis last night. We remember that you said that you came to this area to be close to Elvis. Could you tell us where we might find him?

SWEET LITTLE OLD LADY: No, I think he has left the area cause he’s been discovered.

BOOZER: Do you know where he is going?

SWEET LITTLE OLD LADY: No, not really, but I’m aheadin out fer Pocahontas County. I think Elvis may be aheadin up thataway and I need to be close to Elvis.

On the way back to Alderson Boozer and Three Eight Ball discussed the Elvis sighting.

BOOZER: Boy, Elvis has really gained a massive amount of weight and how about that big beer belly!

THREE EIGHT BALL: Yeah, a lot of weight, but that was no beer belly, that’s a gas tank for a hard-driving sex machine.

BOOZER: Oh, I guess so; Elvis was quite a rounder in his day.


A few days after returning to Alderson, Boozer began to suffer head-splitting headaches. He was concerned since he didn’t know exactly what he might have been exposed to while in Saw Mill Hollow. So he decided that he had better visit his doctor to have himself checked out.

BOOZER: Doctor, I have been having bad headaches for the past week. I just spent a week in Saw Mill Hollow and I don’t know exactly what I might have been exposed to while there. I was somewhat frightened while there due to the legend of the Headless Horseman in Sleepy Hollow, so maybe it’s nerves.

The doctor went through his usual routine and finally decided that he could find nothing wrong with Boozer. His next question seemed a little strange.
DOCTOR: Do you use a cell phone?

Boozer didn’t exactly understand the connection between his cell phone and the week he spent in Saw Mill Hollow, but he answered anyway.

BOOZER: Well, yes, I have one, but very seldom use it. I carry it only for emergency use.

DOCTOR: OK, the headaches don’t seem to be due to cell phone use, so do you listen to Rush Limbaugh?

Boozer thought to himself, this is ridiculous, but again he answered, deciding to go along with the doctor.

BOOZER: Sure, doesn’t everyone?

DOCTOR: How often and for how long?

BOOZER: I usually listen to him every day for the full 3 hours.

DOCTOR: Well, there you have it.

BOOZER: Why? I don’t understand.

DOCTOR: Pet Scans have been made of people’s brains while they are listening to Rush. What has been discovered is that due to Rush’s illogical statements, the electrons in the brain become confused and lose their sense of direction as they travel around the brain. These electrons will quite often crash into one another causing small electrical explosions. In the long run, these explosions will cause a brain abscess which will likely lead to brain cancer.

BOOZER: Gosh!!

DOCTOR: Nothing is definite yet, but medical statisticians are looking into cases where, in the past, the cause of peoples brain problems is thought to be the result of heavy cell phone use. They want to see if there is a statistical correlation among these people and those who listen to Rush Limbaugh.

BOOZER: What do you think?

DOCTOR: Well, with regard to my patients with such a problem, I have found that their headaches disappear if they quit listening to the ranting and raving of Rush Limbaugh. I think that if you will quit listening to him, then your headaches will disappear as well. However, it will take quite a long time for the brain cancer to develop, but I must also point out that, due to the confusion of the electrons in the brain, those who listen to Rush Limbaugh even for a short period of time will have a lower IQ than then those who do not. Moreover, this lowering of IQ is probably irreversible.

Boozer followed his doctor’s advice and sure enough his headaches went away. Due to this experience, Boozer concluded that people who listen to Rush Limbaugh, even for a short period of time, will probably have an irreversible lowering of their IQ and if they are dedicated listeners, then it’s possible that their brains will rot!


Both Boozer and Three Eight Ball were both deeply affected by what they had seen in Snake Run and Saw Mill Hollow and both have had many sleepless nights. In fact, to this day, neither has fully recovered from the Elvis sighting. They both fondly remember the Sweet Little Old Lady, and the jig she danced while singing Ramma, Jamma, Ramma, Jamma, give’m hell Alabama. It was the Upside Down Lady and her children who could navigate the forest with a bat-like radar that left them puzzled. They can’t be sure that they actually saw a family hanging upside down by their feet from tree limbs in Saw Mill Hollow. After many discussions, the boys finally came to the conclusion that they may have been hallucinating. They decided that they were both traumatized due to their fear of being in Saw Mill Hollow because of the legend of the Headless Horseman in Sleepy Hollow.

Finally, it should be pointed out that Boozer and Three Eight Ball have never given up on the Elvis question. To this day they both dream of becoming famous and possibly rich by putting the question of Elvis’ death to rest once and for all. Because of this, during the following two summers Boozer and Three Eight Ball camped out in Pocahontas County trying to “hook up” with Elvis. Boozer even brought along a video camera hoping to record an interview with Elvis. However, much to their disappointment, they were never able to sight Elvis again.

So, what do you think? Is Elvis still alive and roaming the hills of Pocahontas County, hiding out from his fans, hoping to live a life free from the pressures of a performing artist? Or do you believe that the boys were mistaken and that the man they saw really wasn’t Elvis? Could it be possible that the creature they saw actually was a Big Foot that had adapted over the years and learned to speak English? If so, maybe this particular Big Foot had even become an Elvis fan and possibly an Elvis impersonator, swiveling his hips, pointing with his finger and saying “Thank you very much.”
And so the hunt goes on …