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There hasn’t been a time since World War ll when we have had to be so
keenly watchful.
Our shores and borders are being crossed every day by people who do not wish
for our
government to know they are on American soil. They know if they are found
out or
discovered they will be sent back to their country of origin. We know there
are people
who are roaming freely about the country who wish us great harm and if
called on by
their handlers they will kill or maim as many Americans as possible.
Since September 11th, we have been tracking down and pinpointing the people
who were responsible for the carnage in New York, Washington and
Pennsylvania. We have a new cabinet level position in Washington to help in
tracking down these vermin. We have an alert system in place that goes up
and down as the intelligence data dictate and it goes
from “low” up to a “severe state” of alert. At the time of this writing we
are one level
down from that in the “high state” of alert. This system is good if it is
done right and
“wolf “ isn’t cried too often. Already there are people who say it is a
nuisance and no one
should pay heed to it any more. Well, that is until last week.
The sudden pronouncement from Washington that we should all go out and buy
some
clear plastic and duct tape put some extra fear into the population. That
worked for a
little over two days and now that is being put off as nonsense, because we
all have to
breathe and our house has to breathe and if you seal the house up from the
inside,
eventually you will run out of oxygen and we will find millions dead in
their homes.
When they saw that this was going to be a problem, they said “just do one
or two rooms
in the house and then go in and seal it up if the alarm system tells you the
terrorists have
put something in the air.”
I felt real good about this alert notice because I already had a couple of
real big rolls of
duct tape and some clear plastic. You see, being from West Virginia I found
at an early
age about the blessings that come from possessing duct tape. The uses of
duct tape is
endless and the repair cost using it is cheap. A gun stock can be repaired
or re-attached
and prolong the life of the shotgun through three or four more daughters
getting married.
I have heard tell that the tape takes paint well and the shotgun can be
painted white for a
formal wedding in the hills.
When I was discharged from the military, I bought a used car. While the
motor and
transmission were good it was quite evident the winter snow and salt had
eaten well into
several body areas of the car. West Virginia had a vehicle inspection law
enacted which
called for a vehicle passing a certain criterion before it could be
licensed. It was certain
that this car would not be cruising the highways and byways unless something
could be
done about the condition of the vehicle. I of course went down to the local
gas
emporium, shoe repair and Bible store and inquired about how many tons of
body putty
and paint it would take to get me ready to visit the inspection station.
The owner would
have been more than glad to do the necessary work and there was a gleam in
his eye when he informed me of the cost of such an operation. I did some
quick figuring in my head and found that for a just a few dollars more I
could be driving a new pickup truck straight out of the showroom. So I
asked about an alternative. His reply was quick and to the point.
“Duct tape”, he said.
“Duct tape?” I asked.
“Yep, its done everyday around these parts.”
I bought the tape and fixed the car to the point of passing the inspection.
After that, it
seemed for every emergency I had, duct tape was the answer. Soon having
extra rolls of
duct tape around was as essential as having extra batteries for the
flashlight or extra rolls
of toilet paper.
I understand that the government had been experimenting with the new West
Virginia
quarter. They had to recall them because the duct tape that was holding the
two dimes
and a nickel together was clogging up the vending machines.
To be on the safe side, I decided to get in touch with some of my relatives
back in West
Virginia to see if they had the necessary amount of duct tape and clear
plastic on hand as
the government people recommended. They informed me that they had been
ready since
last fall, because every winter they use clear plastic and duct tape to keep
cold air out of
their trailers. They also keep extra duct tape around for fixing water
hoses in the cars and
small plumbing leaks.
I think it is a wonderful idea that duct tape is going to war. It has been
at war in homes
around West Virginia for years. Maybe there should be a special alert
phase between the
“High” and “Severe” state of emergency. We will call it “Duct Tape” state
of emergency.
When that one goes up it will mean that every American will take stock of
how much
duct tape they have on hand in case we are attacked.
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