1928 - Alderson High School - 1968



Affectionate:  Having or expressing
love or fondness.

Dan Duff

St. Valentine’s day comes up and millions of men hurry to some store to buy his wife, lover or friend candy and flowers mostly out of a guilty conscience.  They will make reservations at some over priced restaurant and for one of the few times in their life, they will take two showers in one day.  They will work themselves into a state just short of a full blown heart attack, because just like everything else in their lives, they wait until the absolute last minute and hope they can get it all done on the cell phone before they get to the driveway of their home.

Women want to be doted on.  Especially on Valentines Day, their birthday, anniversary, Christmas, or Thursday night.  They want to be told or shown that they are the most important thing in his life.  If not, you can believe that he will hear about it time and time and time and time again.   They say the basic problem that plagues men is that they never remember and that women never forget.  My wife says it’s very simple and it has been tested and proven that women can handle multiple tasks at one time and able to finish them quickly. Men can only handle one task at a time and it takes them twice as long to finish.  I have asked her to get me the name of the woman who conducted the tests. 

Men believe they show their love by bringing home a nice pay check, putting his wife up in a nice house in a nice neighborhood and giving her a good reliable SUV to get around while doing her  soccer mom chores.  It is up to the man to do all this plus keep the love flame glowing as it did on their third date.  She expects this, but forgets the tests that show man cannot do multi-tasks.  “It doesn’t matter”, she will exclaim “ it just goes to show you, he doesn’t love me like he used to.”

He really does.  It is just that he has gone through a lot of changes in his life and most of them because of her.  Growing up he lived with his parents.  Besides mowing the lawn once a week in the summer and shoveling the snow from the walk and driveway, his time was pretty much his own. School wasn’t all that hard and it gave him something to do during the day. He could party at night and date that special someone.  He would occasionally take her flowers and on Valentines Day he would give her a box of chocolates or a teddy bear.   He could always squeeze out a few extra bucks from his parents for gas and pizza on Friday night and as far as he was concerned the world was perfect.   He would sleep in on the weekends and hang out with his buddies at some sports event. 

His biggest problem was which college to pick and how far away from home did he want to be.  If he didn’t want to go to college he could always join a branch of the armed forces or go to a trade school. If he went into the armed service, he was assured room and board, clothes and training.  If he went to trade school it was probably close to home and he could stay in his old room.  I am hoping by now that you have a picture of a guy who doesn’t have a lot of worries or responsibilities.  He is under the watchful eyes of others who will look out for his best interests and  he lives a wonderful care free existence. Doing one task at a time is about his speed.

Then that one Valentines Day, he makes up his mind that the girl he is dating is the girl he wants to send flowers and candy and teddy bears to for the rest of his life.  From that date his whole life changes.  Now he’s a guy who goes from carefree to serfdom in a manner of days.  He becomes a slave to time, to work, to wife.   With no training he is now worker, husband, father and lover. Balancing his time between the wants of his wife and the wants of his work, he tries to make the best at each world.  He smiles while trying to conquer and master his job, while the needs and wants of his wife are tended to. 

He must show both sides that he is at the top of his game. He must show the company that he and he alone is responsible for their success and at the same time show his wife he cares for her like no other man has shown a woman in the history of the world. He has transformed from an absolute carefree guy to conqueror, lover, provider, teacher and slave.   How does he do it.  After all didn’t that survey and test show that he is not capable of  performing multiple tasks at once?  Shouldn’t he fail at one or another or all? The woman who did those test forgot one of the key ingredient that makes every successful man or task.  That ingredient is love.  Love can conquer all things, mend all things and makes every chore, job or responsibility a delight to accomplish.

I must hurry off now and finish my tasks for today.  I have a roast in the slow cooker, washed two loads of clothes while taking a shower and getting ready for work.  I will close two deals today and run a meeting that will have twenty five people depending on my leadership to get their multi-tasks accomplished.  Meanwhile, I have ordered flowers and made the necessary reservations for dinner while I balanced my checkbook and my time between work and family.    Happy Valentines Day.